April 9, 2008
No, no, not a “poll tax,” but a “pole tax.”
At first, we thought the Great State of Texas was intending to levy a fee on Polish people, and that would indeed be unconstitutional. And then we thought, well, maybe this is an animal story, and it had something to do with polecats.
But, no: The fee in question was a proposed pole tax — essentially an extra five-dollar cover charge for strip-club patrons to be handed over to the state to fund healthcare and sexual-assault prevention programs.
Which all makes for noble intentions, but doesn’t make a whole lot of sense: When men go to strip clubs (face it, folks, there just aren’t a lot of strip clubs catering to female customers), they’re sating some arcane compulsion to buy overpriced, watered-down liquor while throwing even more money at naked women in a relatively safe, secure environment. In other words, strip clubs keep drunken horny guys off the streets.
Judging by my one experience with a straight strip club (on a lark at age 18, I decided I wanted to see Carol Doda, before she was too old and too disabled by those gigantic, silicone-filled gazongas to descend into the Condor Club on her famous flying piano), guys who patronize strip clubs are too drunk (read: impotent) and too broke (there was a two-drink minimum, at $13.50 a pop, back in 1980) to be able to assault, sexually or otherwise, anybody.
Don’t laugh: There are brazillions of studies showing that porn consumption cuts down on sex crimes (you can read about some of them here, and here), so it would make sense that strip clubs serve the same function.
(Granted, there’s always the danger that these drunken horndogs will then get behind the wheel of a car and kill somebody on the way home, but drunk driving is a whole ‘nother issue; if somebody’s going to drive drunk, they’re going to drive drunk at some point, regardless of the circumstances.)
I’ll leave it to you, dear reader, to worry about whether strip clubs (or porn) contribute to the dehumanization of women as sex objects.
Anyway, the “pole tax,” which the state started collecting this past January, is kaput for now. Sez MSNBC:
A state district judge ruled Friday that clubs can’t collect the fee. …
Judge Scott Jenkins wrote that the fee, “while furthering laudable goals, violates the First Amendment to the United States Constitution and is therefore invalid.”
The Texas Entertainment Association Inc., which is a group of topless clubs, and Karpod Inc., the owner of an Amarillo club, sued Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott and Comptroller Susan Combs over the fee.
Witnesses for the strip clubs testified at a hearing last year that the clubs would go out of business if they had to collect an additional $5-per-patron fee. …
Attorneys for the state have argued that the fee does not prohibit nude dancing, does not regulate what entertainers wear and does not regulate the businesses in other ways. The state can appeal the decision.
Posted by: Sapphocrat
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Category:
Crime,
Heterosexuality,
Texas
February 15, 2008
readmoreoften graciously allowed us to post this here.
I’ve been trying to help the Straight community for a long time. The Whites and the Men, too. I totally believe that you are equal. After some soul-searching introspection, I have come to this realization. But I want you to tell you: you must learn to be patient. You Straights have to stop being so angry. It’s a real turn-off to those of us who are trying to help you and give you your equality. Not all of us are out to “get” you. I want to tell you a beautiful story about a Straight couple I saw today at the grocery store:
So I was at the grocery store in the produce aisle with my kids in the cart and I saw a straight couple. They weren’t obvious about it, but I could tell they were straights. They weren’t “doin’ the nasty” (tee hee) or anything like that or even holding hands, but it was totally obvious they were straight. I mean, you know, you see a man and a woman shopping together and you kind of assume… They were standing really close to each other and you could feel the tension between them. I don’t mean sexual tension, I mean, like, emotional tension, like they were a real couple that cared about one another just as if they were regular people.
Well, the other folks in my town were looking at them funny. So many old-fashioned types, it’s to be expected. Even though they tend to be opposed to the idea of thriving heterosexual families, the people in town are good, moral people mostly. I saw my auto mechanic, Harriet, and she seemed a little uncomfortable by the presence of two straights, but she didn’t say anything. (And I know Harriet is the type who rushes out to vote on every anti-straight piece of legislation she can get her hands on!) It’s true, some people were moving their children away from the couple, but you know how people get overprotective with children. I stayed right where I was, though. I wasn’t worried in the least. 
Why should I be concerned if my daughter sees two straights in the grocery store? Who cares! Get over it, right! But I think people were understandably nervous that the couple might kiss orthe man might put his arm around the woman and then their kids would be really confused. I always tell my friends–what do you care if your kids find out about heterosexuality?! It’s not like you can catch it! They’re probably born that way! I’m sure that you straights, of all people, understand, though, why some people wouldn’t want their kids to be straight, given all the prejudices that people have about straights in society and all the injustices that you’ve suffered. I’m sure you wouldn’t want your kids to be straight either! I’m sure if there was a cure, you’d take it! You weren’t asked to be born that way.
BUT THE GOOD NEWS IS the straight couple just bought their vegetables and left the store quickly and without incident. It was no big deal! No one bashed them or called them names or anything! People didn’t even stare too much. So much productive has come of this, I’m sure of it. The straight couple must know that they are welcome in our community. And as for the rest of the people in my town, I think they learned a lesson too. They learned that if you see a pot-bellied, middle aged man and his salt-and-pepper haired female lover/partner/whatever, they’re not going to throw down and have kinky sex in front of your kids! She’s not going to start giving him a blow job like in the porn mags and he’s not going to start doing her in the rump right there in the grocery store for all to see! It just doesn’t happen.
So that’s my message to you Straights out there who think that all the rest of us are out to get you. Relax. We’re on your side. Most people these days believe that what two consenting adults do in the privacy of their own bedrooms is nobody’s business.
But you need to stop being so angry. Nobody is going to tell their politicians to give rights to angry people. And you should probably lower your sights, too. You have to be realistic. Heterosexuality is simply against some people’s religion. When you go to the grocery store, you’re going to get nasty looks from little old trannies and they might call you filthy sinners and so forth. Everyone isn’t going to always like you–you have to accept that. Everybody doesn’t like me and I accept it! Not all your landlords are going to accept that you’re straight. Not all your bosses are going to be okay with it either and you might get fired. But really, if you think about it, how is your boss going to know you’re straight? What? Are you planning on having sex on your desk! 
JK-(yes, I know, all straights are not sex-obsessed freaks who get drunk and spank each other at the holiday office party and go home and have penile-vaginal intercourse and cheat on one another! That’s just a stereotype!)
But seriously. You people need to start courting us or we’ll be less inclined to fight for your equality. A lot of times, we’re just trying to help you, but you just won’t listen to us. And how can we help you, if you don’t listen? Give us a break, okay? We’re your friends. We totally understand and we’re right here to give you a hand up!
Peace!!!!!
Posted by: Buffy
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Guest Articles,
Heterosexuality,
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January 18, 2008
Hypocrisy in the Republican party? Say it isn’t so!
(Houston, Texas) The district attorney who defended the Texas law criminalizing homosexuality before the US Supreme Court is desperately trying to keep his job following the discovery of e-mails containing sexually explicit videos, racist jokes and what is described as torrid love notes to his executive secretary.
Harris County District Attorney Chuck Rosenthal (R) is facing a state investigation into the emails which were discovered on his office computer.
…..
But in 2002 it was “family values” Rosenthal who argued before the US Supreme Court that the Texas law against sodomy was upholding the moral values of the state and was in place to protect families. The case was Lawrence v Texas.
In his arguments he condemned adultery and homosexual acts.
“I think that this Court having determined that there are certain kinds of conduct that it will accept and certain kinds of conduct it will not accept may draw the line at the bedroom door of the heterosexual married couple because of the interest that this Court has that this Nation has and certainly that the State of Texas has for the preservation of marriage, families and the procreation of children,” Rosenthal told the justices.
Apparently adultery is bad, except when Republicans are engaging in it. And gay sex is always bad of course–except when Republicans are doing it in public restrooms with the full forgiveness of God.
I hereby nominate Rosenthal for his very own page on Conservative Babylon.
Posted by: Buffy
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Corruption,
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Republican Sexcapades,
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Texas
July 23, 2007
Family Foundation Hopes to Reduce Divorce in Virginia
The conservative advocacy group Family Foundation wants to see a drop in the state’s divorce rate. The group that lead the push to ban same-sex marriage in Virginia has formed a commission that will recommend public policies that could preserve traditional marriages.
. . .
The panel will not try to curb all divorce, [Victoria Cobb, the foundation’s executive director] said. “There’s no question that some people are going to get divorced, no matter what,” she said. “But the law can provide speed bumps.”
In 2004 there were 3.7 divorces per 1,000 people nationally and 7.8 marriages per 1,000, according to the National Center for Health Statistics. That year in Virginia, there were 3.9 divorces per 1,000 people and 8.3 marriages per 1,000. “Everyone agrees there is a problem, and no one is attempting to solve it,” said Cobb, who was frustrated by the legislature’s failure this year to pass any of a half-dozen bills on marriage and divorce, including one promoted by her group.
. . .
Cobb said she agreed with one point made by [opponents of the state’s constitutional same-sex marriage ban]: “Considering the high rate of divorce, heterosexuals haven’t done a very good job with marriage.” …
Not that it’s going to do a lot of good, for anyone. But if these gay-bashers actually succeed in getting any “speed bumps” to divorce in place, it will be enjoyable to sit back and watch Virginia’s straight population go ballistic for a change. Let ‘em see how it feels.
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Posted by: Sapphocrat
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Heterosexuality,
Marriage Equality,
Radical Religious Right
