Or is bashing one’s daughter over the head with a lump of concrete an acceptable means of coercion— er, conversion?
Yeah, that’s a real question. I mean, once you stick electrodes on men’s tender bits in order to shock the gay away, and when the President of the Quorum of Twelve thinks it’s A-OK to punch out a suspected ‘mo because a Mormon can’t be held responsible for his own, uncontrollable gay panic, it isn’t too far a stretch from there to braining one’s daughter in order to get her to come to the truth and light and love that is the Mormon church.
Stuff like this doesn’t happen in a vacuum, you know (and you can thank us later for not even mentioning the Mountain Meadows Massacre… again— oh, oopsy!):
Isn’t it heartening to see both sides of politics united in their determination to protect a vulnerable minority from the whims of the majority? Kevin Rudd and Malcolm Turnbull both oppose gay marriage against the wishes of the majority of Australians.
This week a poll was published showing 60 per cent of Australians supported the idea of equal marriage laws. Another 4 per cent were undecided, leaving just 36 per cent opposed to gay marriage. Among young voters, support rose to 74 per cent. …
The stance Rudd and Turnbull are taking may be unpopular, but not everything in politics is about popularity. Obviously they have decided in this case it is more important to protect the persecuted minority of Australians who identify as bigots, a minority whose lifestyle is under attack.
Sorry, I shouldn’t use “bigot”; apparently that’s not politically correct these days. I’ll be rapped over the knuckles by the thought police. I’m sure they prefer to be called something euphemistic like “People Living With A Need To Exclude Other People From The Institution Of Marriage Because It Makes Their Own Marriages Seem More Special”.
Even though laws have been tweaked to remove many forms of discrimination against gay couples, neither major party is willing to go all the way. They are not prepared to follow the radical lead set in godless, radical jurisdictions such as Belgium, Canada, Spain and the US state of Iowa, out of concern for the sensibilities of the 36 per centers. The philosophy is something akin to saying: “Hey, gay people, you say you want some chocolate? Have some delicious no-frills carob drops. I don’t want to eat them myself, but I’m sure they taste just like the real thing.”
It may just be possible to find a solution which respects the values of both the majority and the minority in this debate. And to this end I would like to propose a novel legislative solution: what if the Government introduced gay marriage as an option - but didn’t make it compulsory? So that you don’t have to have a gay marriage unless you want to? So that if you believe in marriage only between a man and a woman, you only have to enter into a marriage with someone of the opposite sex? …
I’ve seen Australian soap operas, and their effect on fans. In fact, entire states of Australia drop what they’re doing to watch “Neighbours” and “Home and Away” every evening. The appeal mystifies me (although the women are usually pretty hot), so I’m for anything that will shake up these shows. Right now, there’s an ongoing “controversy” surrounding competing storylines that involves — gasp! — lesbian kissing! Oh, the horror!
Which leaves me scratching my head. I mean, this is a country where profanity generally isn’t censored from the airwaves, you’re as likely as not to see bare boobs during primetime, and after 10:00 p.m., you’re quite likely to see full frontal male nudity on the free-to-air foreign channels.
New Hampshire governor John Lynch announced Thursday that he will sign legislation to extend full marriage rights to gay and lesbian couples, making his state the fifth in New England to put such a law on the books. …
Aussie blogger Cate Swannell, short, sweet, & e.e. cummings-like:
suck on this proposition 8 and every californian that voted for it.
From our those wacky, frothing-at-the-mouth anti-gays at LifeSiteNews.com:
There is a growing culture of suppression among secularist governments that is using the doctrine of “tolerance and diversity” to push Christians entirely out of public life, Australia’s Cardinal Pell told an audience at Oxford University this weekend.
If only!
The rest of the high hysteria quotes Pell (who, didja know, has a lesbian cousin who’s done her best to talk some sense into the ol’ dress-wearing ‘phobe) lying about how us godless heathen-types are trying to drive Christianity “not only from the public square but even from the provision of education, health care, and welfare services to the wider community.” Pell, didn’t anybody teach you about the 9th Commandment? You’re the ones trying to deprive us of the most basic necessities (since you haven’t been able to resurrect the Inquisition, yet) — not the other way around.
Aside from the rest of Pell’s usual anti-gay (and anti-woman) histrionics, the part that tickled me most was his use of the word “homosexualist.” Boy, I haven’t heard that one in a while! To paraphrase Michael in The Boys in the Band: “Why don’t you just say ’sodomite’? Or ‘pederast’? My, what an antiquated vocabulary you have.” But, hey, what do you expect from a desperately ludicrous, homo-obsessed drama queen who probably has a secret bedroom shrine to Pope Gregory IX?
As India’s High Court Mulls Reform, Nations Should Repeal This Legacy
NEW YORK — December 17, 2008 — More than half of the world’s remaining “sodomy” laws — criminalizing consensual homosexual conduct — are relics of British colonial rule, Human Rights Watch showed in a report published today. Human Rights Watch urged governments everywhere to affirm international human rights standards, and reject the oppressive legacies of colonialism, by repealing laws that criminalize consensual sexual activity among adults of the same sex.
The 66-page report, “This Alien Legacy: The Origins of ‘Sodomy’ Laws in British Colonialism,” describes how laws in over three dozen countries, from India to Uganda and from Nigeria to Papua New Guinea, derive from a single law on homosexual conduct that British colonial rulers imposed on India in 1860. This year, the High Court in Delhi ended hearings in a years-long case seeking to decriminalize homosexual conduct there. A ruling in the landmark case is expected soon.
“Half the world’s countries that criminalize homosexual conduct do so because they cling to Victorian morality and colonial laws,” said Scott Long, director of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender rights program at Human Rights Watch. “Getting rid of these unjust remnants of the British Empire is long overdue.”
On December 18, 2008, the UN General Assembly will hear a statement signed by over 60 countries affirming that human rights protections include sexual orientation and gender identity.
Some national leaders have defended sodomy laws as reflections of indigenous cultures. Zimbabwe’s Robert Mugabe, for example, has called gays and lesbians “un-African” and “worse than dogs and pigs.” The Human Rights Watch report shows, however, that British colonial rulers brought in these laws because they saw the conquered cultures as morally lax on sexuality. The British also wanted to defend their own colonists against the “corrupting” effect of the colonies. One British viceroy of India warned that British soldiers could succumb to “replicas of Sodom and Gomorrah” as they acquired the “special Oriental vices.”
In the early 19th century, the British drafted a new model Indian Penal Code, finally put into force in 1860. Section 377 punished “carnal intercourse against the order of nature” with up to life imprisonment.
Versions of Section 377 spread across the British Empire, from Africa to Southeast Asia. Through it, British colonists imposed one view on sexuality, by force, on all their colonized peoples. Over time, these laws came to seek punishment against not particular acts but whole classes of people. The British, for instance, listed “eunuchs” - their term for India’s hijras, or transgender people - as a “criminal tribe” because they were prone to “sodomy.” Simply for appearing in public, hijras could be arrested and jailed for up to two years.
Today, international human rights standards have compelled former colonial powers to acknowledge that these laws are wrong. England and Wales decriminalized homosexual conduct in 1967. The European Court of Human Rights found in 1981 that a surviving sodomy law in Northern Ireland violated fundamental rights protections. In 1994, the UN Human Rights Committee — which authoritatively interprets the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights (ICCPR) — held that sodomy laws violate the rights to privacy and to non-discrimination.
The laws nonetheless persist in many of Britain’s old colonial possessions. Moreover, the model British-era sodomy law made no distinction between consensual and non-consensual sex, or between sex among adults and sexual abuse of children. As a result, these surviving laws leave many rape victims and child victims of abuse without effective legal protection.
“From Malaysia to Uganda, governments use these laws to harass civil society, restrict free expression, discredit enemies, and destroy lives,” Long said. “And sodomy laws add to the spread of HIV/AIDS by criminalizing outreach to affected groups.”
Colonies and countries that retain versions of this British sodomy law include:
• In Asia and the Pacific: Bangladesh, Bhutan, Brunei, India, Kiribati, Malaysia, Maldives, Marshall Islands, Myanmar (Burma), Nauru, Pakistan, Papua New Guinea, Singapore, Solomon Islands, Sri Lanka, Tonga, Tuvalu, and Western Samoa. (Governments that inherited the same British law, but have abolished it since include: Australia, Fiji, Hong Kong, and New Zealand.)
• In Africa: Botswana, Gambia, Ghana, Kenya, Lesotho, Malawi, Mauritius, Nigeria, Seychelles, Sierra Leone, Somalia, Swaziland, Sudan, Tanzania, Uganda, Zambia, and Zimbabwe.
Eleven former British colonies in the Caribbean also retain sodomy laws derived from a different British model than the one imposed on India.
Today is D-day for the renegade St Mary’s Catholic Church in South Brisbane either to toe the Vatican line or face possible excommunication.
The church’s popular but unconventional priest, Father Peter Kennedy, is digging in his heels and has vowed to stay put in a “non-violent response” to the threat.
Brisbane Catholic Archbishop John Bathersby has demanded the parish cease its unapproved services, including giving communion to divorced and gay people, allowing priests to wear non-traditional vestments and baptising babies using unorthodox wording.
Father Kennedy and a fellow St Mary’s priest, Father Terry Fitzpatrick, are also accused of breaking the rules by blessing anyone who asked and allowing members of the congregation, including women, to present parts of the service.
Archbishop Bathersby has yet to spell out what disciplinary action he may take on St Mary’s but one possibility is to have the Vatican eject it from the Catholic Church.
In a letter to Father Kennedy last month, the archbishop said his request for the church to change its ways had been ignored.
“Games are still being played as they were in the past,” he said. …
Father Kennedy has refused to comment but told Fairfax Media last month that the parish would not budge because “that’s where the work is”. …
The relatively young congregation of about 700 includes local Aborigines, the homeless and the formerly disillusioned who have returned to the flock after experiencing the St Mary’s brand of Catholicism. …
More at the link.
If there’d been a church like St. Mary’s when I was a kid, I would have remained a Catholic a lot longer than I did. See, it wasn’t that I stopped believing in the Christian God at the tender age of 15; I stopped believing in the church. A church that preached love for all, but denied its blessings to some was just too much hypocrisy for me to take.
The Australian government has passed legislation recognizing same-sex couples under a large number of laws, but the measure falls short of granting either marriage or civil unions.
The omnibus bill mounted its final hurdle Monday, winning approval in the Senate. The legislation passed the House in September. It still requires the signature of the Governor General, a formality, before going into effect.
The Same-Sex Entitlements Bill removes discrimination against same-sex partners in areas such as immigration, taxation, veterans’ pensions and aged care. It also abolishes discrimination against children of same-sex couples by granting equal rights to both parents.
In total, it amends 68 Commonwealth laws.
“They deliver on a very important election commitment on an important day for us,” Labor senator Penny Wong, who is openly gay, told the Senate during Monday’s debate.
“They will deliver the sort of equality before the law that same-sex couples have never previously experienced.”
Green Party Leader Bob Brown, who also is openly gay and a long-time campaigner for same-sex rights, called passage of the bill a major step forward. …
What’s the problem with that? It’s November 22nd (the 23rd in Australia), after all, and—
The problem is, while we’re into late autumn Up Over, Down Under it’s almost summer (which starts December 1st.) Believe me, I’ve spent Christmas and New Year’s in southeastern Australia, and it’s a freaking sauna, even as far south on the continent as NSW.
(Remember, Down Under, north is warm, and south is cold. The southern end is closer to Antarctica; if you want to see the most wondrous, touching sight in all of Australia, the fairy penguin parade, you don’t have to drive but a short ways out of Melbourne. That’s how cold the south is — but only in the winter, which is, more or less, during our summer.)
Gale force winds and snow in the NSW central-west are keeping State Emergency Service volunteers busy, just a week from the start of summer.
Since Friday, SES crews have responded to 18 requests for assistance in the Blayney, Bathurst, Lithgow and Orange areas.
Most of the damage has been caused by falling trees, but local roads are also being monitored after snow falls on Saturday night. …
“It’s very unusual the week before summer to have such weather conditions,” Mr Ronan said. …
That’s the understatement of the year.
The Bureau of Meteorology has issued a severe weather warning for NSW, with a deep low pressure system off the South Coast expected to bring gale-force winds to most of the state before it moves east late on Sunday.
Winds are expected to average 65kmh with peak gusts in excess of 90kmh.
Blizzard conditions are also anticipated in alpine areas of the Southern Tablelands, South West Slopes and the ACT. …
The point: Naaaaaaaaaaaaaah, there’s nothing to all that global-warming hooey from those godless scientists! (And never you mind that California enjoyed gorgeous, summer-like, 80-degree weather all last week, when we should have been huddling under blankets while cold rain pelted the roof.)
Meanwhile, also Down Under, 52 pilot whales ran aground on Tasmania and died. And nobody knows why.
New Zealand Prime Minister Helen Clark has admitted defeat in a general election and says she will step down as leader of the Labour Party. …
This is bad news, and not just because we lost a very pro-gay Prime Minister in a country that actually still kinda likes Americans, but because New Zealand has just lurched to the right. The opposition that just won control is the not-at-all-nice National Party. Not nice at all.
*sigh*
Can anyone give me some good news this week? Remember, I don’t give a hoot about sports, so make it something else… like, you just bought my wife and me a little Early American house on a couple of acres in Connecticut.
Premier David Bartlett has ordered his department to scrap taxpayer-funded surveys that have been done over the past two years on political issues and made available to Cabinet.
The departmental surveys, done by international marketing and research company Millward Brown, cost $15,000 each and surveyed Tasmanians on issues ranging from water development, economic management, housing, roads and transport, support for pensioners, education, climate change and environmental management.
One person surveyed said he was also asked questions relating to perceptions of community tolerance towards people from multicultural backgrounds and gay people. …
“I have asked that the community survey work be discontinued. I do not see this as a high-priority issue for the department to be involved in and consider its value to be limited,” Mr Bartlett said. …
This, despite acknowledging that “the information gathered on a range of subjects aided policy-making and allowed community input in the formulation of that policy.”
You’d think Bartlett (who’s Labor, the more-or-less equivalent of the comparably spineless U.S. Democratic Party, but generally better-than-the-Liberals/Republicans) would want to know this stuff — especially in Tasmania, which has been leading the pack of the remaining Australian states/territories in the fight for marriage equality.
Side note: As you may recall, John Howard’s right-wing government rammed an anti-marriage equality amendment into Australia’s constitution in 2004 — yet it is this very amendment that created a potential loophole to allow individual Australian states to legalize same-sex marriage. Back in 2005, Troy Rollo explained the whole convoluted mess, which he aptly likens to “a script from a Monty Python movie,” in “Gay marriage in Tasmania - nothing new, it’s already legal.” It’s a massively confusing situation, but an ultimately entertaining (and very informative) read.
Not like that’s any big surprise. Joke’s on Freddie & Co., ‘though — the Westboro Asshats— er, Baptists have no idea where Ledger’s funeral is to be held, although it would make sense that it would be in the actor’s hometown of Perth… Australia. (Go ahead, Fred! Take the whole damn klan overseas — we’d bet money your psychotic bunch will never get past the good folks of the Australian Customs Service.)
A fundamentalist church whose members demonstrate at the funerals of soldiers killed in Iraq and believe God hates gays will protest the Academy Awards and the funeral of Heath Ledger, because the actor played a gay cowboy in the 2005 film “Brokeback Mountain.”
Members of the Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kan., are trying to find out where the 28-year-old actor’s funeral will be held and have already made signs to hold outside the Oscars that read “God Hates Fags and Fag Enablers,” “Heath in Hell” and “Mourn for Your Sins,” Shirley Phelps-Roper, daughter of the church’s controversial founder Pastor Fred Phelps, told ABCNEWS.com.
Though Ledger was not gay, the church believes he “misused the giant megaphone given to him by God Almighty to speak the truth about fags,” Phelps-Roper said, and instead “used his position of prominence to say God is a liar and that homosexuality is not an abomination.”
The time and location of the Ledger’s funeral remain unknown, but it is widely believed it will take place in the actor’s native Australia.
“They are going to try and hide the body like a bunch of ghouls so we can’t protest. The only thing in this country people worship more than filthy sex acts is the dead,” Phelps-Roper said.
She said members of the church had already purchased plane tickets to picket outside the Oscars, scheduled for Feb. 24 in Hollywood.
A press release posted to the church’s Web site, godhatesfags.com, reads: “Heath Ledger is now in Hell, and has begun serving his eternal sentence there — besides which, nothing else about Heath Ledger is relevant or consequential.”
“The group is made up of people who are almost literally out of their minds” … “I doubt there is anyone in America who thinks more about gay sex than Fred Phelps,” Potok said.
Frustrated by a lack of official action on homophobic violence, the gay and lesbian community will organise its own security patrols at popular events and party venues.
The GenQ Street Angels want volunteers with policing, military, security or medical experience to join.
. . .
“We’re hoping that just by their presence, the Angels will deter people from any sort of threatening behaviour,” Mr Stopps said.
He stressed that the initiative would not be about vigilantism. But, he said, if people were now scared to venture out at night it was time to do something about it.
. . .
Fewer than 35 per cent thought increased police patrols were enough to remedy the situation and almost 60 per cent said they were in favour of community security patrols.
A victim of homophobic violence claims a police officer tried to convince him not to file a report.
Jean Pierre Cheaib was leaving a Taylor Square nightclub about 10am 19 August when two men called him a “stupid poof”, told him he was “going to die” and hit him in the jaw.
. . .
“The officer told me how stressful the court process would be and said, ‘Do you realise that nine out of 10 gay men don’t report incidents because they are afraid?’” Cheaib said.
“I said I wanted to press charges anyway, and they said, ‘The men are only going to get off free.’”
. . .
Two days later, Cheaib reported the incident to the coordinator of ACON’s Lesbian and Gay Anti-Violence Project, Carl Harris, who spoke to police about their handling of the confrontation.
Cheaib later received a phone call from the officer he had spoken to after the assault. The officer allegedly told Cheaib the matter would be “thrown out of court anyway”.
Australia refuses to recognise married transsexual
A post-operative transsexual has been told by Australian authorities that in order to be registered as her correct sex she must divorce her wife.
Completing her gender reassignment in 2002, the unnamed woman, who is happily married, has been unable to change her gender on her birth certificate in her current married status as same sex marriage is still banned in Australia.
. . .
Transsexuals in Australia who are still in the process of transitioning are now banned from having their intended gender on their passports following an amendment made to passport legislation earlier this year.
This was highlighted when Stefanie Imbruglia, a cousin of singer Natalie, attempted to obtain a temporary passport so she could travel to Thailand for gender reassignment surgery and was told she would have to travel with a male passport.
Christian lobbyists have warned federal MPs that reforms to give same-sex couples de facto status would “normalise” same-sex couples and lead to gay marriage.
But Labor’s proposed state-based relationship registries has been given the Australian Christian Lobby’s (ACL) tick of approval.
ACL director Jim Wallace attacked the Human Rights and Equal Opportunity Commission’s (HREOC) Same-Sex: Same Entitlements report, saying it was “social engineering”.
“We reject HREOC’s attempts to normalise same-sex relationships by extending the definition of de facto marriage and redefining parenthood,” he said.
“Such a move plays directly into the hands of activists whose long-term aim has been to redefine marriage and family.”
While Sapphocrat says:
They’re just blowing smoke. First, “de facto” (a.k.a. “interdependent”) relationships are the norm across the board in Oz; the term applies to unmarried hetero couples, too — and while it’s more difficult to establish a same-sex de facto relationship (yes, you need reams of paper “proof”), the same hassles apply for extracting oneself from such a relationship. It’s as close as Australia’s got to civil unions, for everyone.
Second: Nothing is going to “lead to gay marriage” in Australia, as long as the federal constitution prohibits it (which it now does, thanks to John Howard). There is no slippery slope.
What we really don’t understand is why Hussein is bitching about the asylum process: “On the whole the tribunal is homophobic, but on this instance they accepted I was homosexual and I would face persecution if sent back.”
Sure, refugees have to jump through hoops (especially in Australia, which treats refugees like human garbage), and gay and lesbian applicants have to jump through even more hoops — but fercrimenysakes, he’s in. If he wanted a comparatively easier process, he could have gone to Canada, or even the U.S. (which, while denying same-sex couples immigration rights, is generally more welcoming to gay asylum seekers).
If nothing else, Hussein is mad as a cut snake to complain before his visa is finalized (right now, he’s on a bridging visa).
Same-sex couples will stage a mass gay wedding ceremony on Montefiore Hill as part of November’s Feast Festival.
While gay marriage is not legal in Australia, Feast artistic director Daniel Clarke said the celebration, called Loved Up, would be an opportunity for same-sex partners to publicly declare their love and commitment.
“It is a political statement but it will also be a really fun day,” Mr Clarke said yesterday. “There are 20 couples at the moment and it keeps increasing. It’s not a mock-up and people are taking it very seriously.”
The ceremony, to be held on November 18, will be followed by a garden party with wedding singers and musicians on the lawns of Carclew. …
The Catholic Church says it will not co-operate with any safe-sex campaign to educate 500,000 young pilgrims expected to flock to Sydney for Australia’s biggest religious event.
The NSW Department of Health will have to go it alone if it wants to develop and disseminate any messages about safe sex, including information on HIV and sexually transmittable diseases, which it provided for the Sydney Olympics in 2000, the Gay Games and the annual Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras.
The church has refused to promote health advice that contradicts its position on contraception. It has reasserted its opposition to condom use, argued that Catholics should postpone sex until marriage, and pointed to an “extraordinary low level of indiscretion” at previous events.
. . .
The church’s “head in the sand approach” has drawn criticism from the Greens MP Lee Rhiannon, who described its position as dangerous and said it missed an important opportunity to send a message of lifelong safe practices to young participants.
The church said it encouraged young people to have a high level of self-esteem and respect for their bodies, sexuality, relationships, marriage and family life: “Organisers of previous World Youth Days testify to the extraordinarily high level of idealism amongst the young people who attend and the extraordinarily low level of indiscretion.”
Well then, there’s no problem, is there, if young people have an “extraordinarily low level of indiscretion.” There would be a problem only if they had a low level of discretion.
Parliamentarians in Indonesia’s remote province of Papua say they are considering a controversial bylaw to “tag” people infected with AIDS with microchips so they can better monitor their behavior and sexual activities.
. . .
Indonesia has one of Asia’s fastest-growing HIV rates, with up to 290,000 infections out of 235 million people, fueled mainly by injecting drug users and prostitution.
Health authorities have warned that a failure to take prompt action in areas like Papua, where infections are 15 times the national average, could result in 1 million people infected with HIV within a few years.
Parliamentarians are likely to consider public opinion before discussing the draft bylaw with the local government and seeking to enact it. The proposal has already drawn protests from AIDS activists and health workers.
“Like-minded”? You mean John Howard, Junichiro Koizumi, and Gloria Macapagal Arroyo can’t pronounce the word subliminal, either — and they make up words like misunderestimated and Hispanically?
Speaking of which, Dubyaspeak offers Junior’s latest mangling of the English language:
Al Qaeda is a group of people that they don’t care about taking innocent life.
As the Resident-in-Chiefdodges a trip to the Merry Old Land of Oz (where “The Bush” does not mean “Bush Country“), President Gore is scheduled to travel to Sydney and pick up the slack from our environmentally-hostile Boy King — Big Al is going to try to talk PM John Howard into signing the Kyoto Treaty. Of course, Howard is merely an even-less likeable version of Tony Blair, Junior’s pet poodle… which must make Howard Junior’s pet dingo. But I really shouldn’t say that; fantastic claims of Lindy Chamberlain aside, it’s a nasty thing to say about dingos.
Speaking of Poodle Boy, one of his advisors (soon, no doubt, to become an ex-advisor), Sir Jonathan Porritt, pretty much came right and said that the Iraq “war” was all about oil. “I don’t think the war would have happened if Iraq didn’t have the second-largest oil reserves in the world,” sez the ballsy Brit. If you’re not surprised to hear these words come out of one of Blair’s supposed suporters, then maybe you’ll be surprised the story was actually printed in a big U.S. news outlet: Bloomberg. I know I am. (Pleased, mind you, but still surprised.)
This sort of thing, naturally, provokes The Shrub to reprise his little “WMD will be found!” ditty — a song aired so often it’s gone past the point of overplay, and into overkill. Georgie, we don’t believe you. We never believed you. And if you manage to produce so much as a firecracker with a drop of mustard gas on it, we’ll believe it was planted. Give it up, George — you’ve done it to death, and destroyed your credibility; if we were were facing such “imminent” threat from all those fantasy weapons, somebody would have used them against us by now. What do you think those Iraqis are waiting for, anyway?
As they say in Texas, Ah’ll tell yuh whut: If somebody invaded my country, and blew my family to bits where they slept, and I had access to so much as a pea shooter, you can bet your shit-kickers I’d use it on the first invader I saw. What would I have to lose?
But, getting back to our British cousins: The Telegraph gave the U.S. a good kick in the slats over the differences in the ways our respective troops deal with Iraqi locals. Simply put, the Iraqis like the British better than the Americans because the Brits treat the Iraqis like human beings. I’m sure not every Yank is a psychotic Rambo pumped up on steroids, nor every Brit the Laurence Olivier of the battlefield; but I’m also certain there’s more truth in this story than anybody this side of the pond would care to admit.
“Our methods of dealing with the locals are very, very different from that of the Yanks,” notes one officer. “Unlike the Americans we have taken off our helmets and sunglasses and we look the locals in the eye. If we see one vehicle heading at speed towards a checkpoint we let it through. It is only one vehicle. We call our method ‘raid and aid’ — don’t ask me what we call the American way.”
What else have we today? Oh, yes — “Saving Private Lynch” is back in the news… a story I normally avoid like the plague these days, since it, too, gives me a rash. However, this is actually interesting: The medical staff who treated Lynch after her miraculous, awe-inspiring, heartwarming (and ultimately nausea-inducing) TV-movie-of-the-week rescue say the myth is, well, a myth. It’s a long story, but well worth the read.
Finally, the BushAssh- Nominee of the Day is Claude A. Allen — who has not only made his disdain for “queers” (in quotes this time because it’s his word) perfectly clear, and confirmed his enormous disconnect with reality by believing abstinence-only programs are the sole route to stopping the spread of HIV, but has demonstrated what must be an unfathomable amount of self-loathing, through his support of racist bigot Jesse Helms — who uses the N-word with the most casual aplomb; i.e., “I think all men are equal, be they sl-nts, b–ners or n—–s“. (Did I mention Allen is black?)
Okay, not all the news — just the stuff I’m ruminating on… er, on which I’m ruminating…
There was white stuff in Southern California last night — in the form of a great big snow job from Resident Dubs aboard the U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln. He snowed them up north in Santa Clara, too — “them” being a crowd of hand-picked automatons pre-programmed to applaud wildly every time Junior stopped to take a breath during his sales pitch for his big tax cut. Hear tell major Silicon Valley leaders spoiled by a long and close working relationship with Presidents Clinton and Gore were not invited to the clusterfu—circle jer— speech.
Your intrepid analyst stayed up late last night finishing a long response to Dubbie’s talk to the troops, and decided to shelve the whole thing; it was just too long. Instead, kindly direct your attention to this most excellent open letter to the Commando-in-Chief, from the blessedly fair-minded San Jose Mercury News — which says everything we’d all like to say, but much more politely. This is a must-must-must-read you’ll truly appreciate, even if you’ve never been to the Golden State.
Couldn’t help but notice the Shrubster’s crowing, in both speeches, about how nicely the U.S. put the Taliban out of business in Afghanistan (you know — the country we laid waste to a year and a half ago).
Said Dubs: “In the battle of Afghanistan, we destroyed one of the most barbaric regimes in the history of mankind. A regime so barbaric, they would not allow young girls to go to school.”
Which makes today’s grammatically-awkward AP headline — Afghan Women Urged to Dress Traditional — a curious juxtaposition indeed. Don’t buy the no-big-deal tone of the story; Afghan women (at least outside of Kabul) are no better off than they ever were. Their oppressors are the Afghan warlords now — who are doing a lot worse than merely “urging” women to don the hijab.
So don’t let Bush & Rummy’s happy talk fool you. And, judging from America’s sorry track record, it’s an even-money bet that we’ll pull out and leave the country to its own grim fate, just like we did the first time around. (For news and commentary from those who really know what’s going on over there, you’ll find no better source than RAWA.)
Speaking of countries that hate our guts, what’s up with Iraq? Well, when I read the first headline this a.m., I thought I’d fallen into some parallel universe: The U.S. has decided to divide Iraq into three “military sectors,” divvying up duty among itself, Britain, and Poland. (Gee, guess Australia’s 2,000 elite SAS troops were no match for Poland’s 700 regular grunts — maybe the Aussies didn’t kill enough Iraqis to merit their own sector — and maybe that’s what Little Johnny Howard has come to ‘Murika to discuss with the Boy King).
Six more countries — Spain, Italy, Denmark, Bulgaria, Ukraine and the Netherlands — are going to help out in the British and Polish sectors, while the U.S. is telling the United Nations (remember them?) that although the U.N. can provide humanitarian aid, it won’t be “allowed” to contribute to peacekeeping efforts. Well, boo-hoo — the U.N. isn’t interested in playing Police Squad, anyway; Kofi Annan says he’s more interested in “political facilitation.” Good for you, Kofi — they’re going to need it.
Now, don’t get your hopes up that the arrival of all these new international troops are going to bring our men and women home any sooner; the influx of all those Italians and Bulgarians and the rest are only going to “augment” the troops already there.
Of course, France, Germany, and Russia all got the royal Dub Snub.
Meanwhile, the folks in Fallujah — where U.S. troops shot and killed a bunch of protesters last week — say they’ll start lobbing bombs (instead of mere grenades) at occupying forces if the U.S. refuses to clear out. The locals are Sunnis — and some of them believe the troops’ sunglasses offer X-ray vision. Yes, really.
Three-dot quickies: Senate Minority Leader Tom Daschle again demonstrated his need for a spinal implant in another shameless display of sucking up to Sonny Bush… Maybe Ashcroft’s dog ate the fax (or the courier); either way, some evidence about false testimony from a key witness in the Timothy McVeigh trial was never revealed to the Oklahoma City bomber’s defense team… Finally, Col. Matthew F. Bogdanos (in real life, the lead prosecutor in the Sean “Puffy” Combs’ nightclub-shooting trial, and well-known pit bull), in charge of investigating the rape of Iraq’s National Museum, is trying to convince the public that — contrary to reports of more than 170,000 priceless antiquities stolen from Baghdad — no more than 25 are missing (which may just be his way of saying the other 169,975 were smashed to bits).
The war against Iraq was going extremely well, Prime Minister John Howard said today…
“I believe in all the circumstances (it is) going extremely well,” he told reporters.
“To those who are suggesting that because it hasn’t in effect resulted in complete victory in the space of a week, I suggest they take a reality check and understand a number of things.”
“Complete victory”? Those boys rationed down to a single bottle of water per day would probably settle for one lousy supply convoy getting to its destination.
Or do you mean it’s going “extremely well” because the only Australian casualty so far has been a news cameraman?
Bush has said he believes, as commander-in-chief, that he should be the last person in the chain of command to express doubts or worries about what his administration is doing, fearing that would quickly demoralize his team.
So, Georgie, you’re afraid to hurt somebody’s feelings by questioning the massive screw-ups in Iraq? Or were you ever in the driver’s seat at all? Well, at least we know who’s not in charge. Call to tell us who’s really calling the shots? Rove, Cheney, Rummy, Perle? Or all of the above?
Oh, wait a minute! If Georgie isn’t really running the show, that’s what John Howard must have meant by things going “extremely well.”
US-led forces have yet to get their hands on Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein but they may have hit him where it hurts — sinking his luxurious yacht, a British commander said.
And I was worried that we weren’t making any progress. Now, let’s blow up his SUV — that’ll really hurt!
Despite official statements that everything is fine on America’s southern border, the Bush administration seems to be giving cold treatment to Mexican President Vicente Fox after Mexico’s decision not to back the U.S. stand on Iraq in the U.N. Security Council.
In sharp contrast to their much-publicized friendship two years ago, when they bragged about being on the phone constantly to consult on major issues, President Bush waited four days before returning a call from the Mexican president, senior U.S. officials told me.
“Fox wanted to test the waters, to see how the relationship was,” says one U.S. official familiar with the conversation. “He should realize that the relationship has been affected.”
That’s right, Georgie, piss off both our nearest neighbors. At least Fox has the class not to stay mad about Javier Medina.
Felicitaciones, Señor Presidente, para tener los cojones para hacer el primer gesto de amistad. Me disculpo por el “hissy fit” de Señor Bush.
Despite the desert conditions of the Iraqi campaign, many American soldiers are sporting deep-green combat fatigues. Why are some troops donning woodland camouflage?
According to published reports, the Pentagon simply goofed by not anticipating the demand for sand-colored desert fatigues, formally known as battle-dress uniforms. When Army and Marine units were preparing for deployment, several discovered that they lacked enough desert BDUs to outfit each soldier with the requisite three outfits. The UPI reports that the Army’s 4th Infantry Division, headquartered at Fort Hood, Texas, chose to dress all its troops in the more traditional green fatigues — commonly referred to as woodland BDUs — rather than have only some don desert dress. Homogeneity is generally preferred among military commanders…
Oh, heavens, that makes all the sense in the world! Mixing dark-green camouflage and desert-sand would be like wearing white after Labor Day! We simply can’t sacrifice good fashion sense for a little safety, can we?
Military leaders insist that the shortage of desert BDUs will not affect the safety of American soldiers. They point out that Iraq’s terrain is not entirely Sahara-like, and that green camouflage may actually work better near the banks of the Euphrates River, where vegetation and mud are present.
What a relief. Now we just have to hold our collective breath until they make it to the river. But considering their progress so far…
Ignoring a presidential ban, Afghanistan’s farmers are growing more opium poppies than ever throughout the country, including areas previously free of the crop, officials said Thursday…
The production of opium, from which heroin is refined, was wiped out under the hard-line Taliban regime, but farmers began planting it again when the religious militia was deposed in 2001 during the U.S.-led war on terror. Some farmers ripped up their wheat fields to plant the lucrative drug-producing plant, which brings in hundreds of times the revenue.
Oh, so that’s what we “liberated” Afghanistan for!
Or is there some sort of dirty deal in the works?
April, 1978: Soviet-backed coup in Afghanistan sets stage for explosive growth in Southwest Asian heroin trade. New Marxist regime undertakes vigorous anti-narcotics campaign aimed at suppressing poppy production, triggering a revolt by semi-autonomous tribal groups that traditionally raised opium for export. The CIA-supported rebel Mujahedeen begins expanding production to finance their insurgency. Between 1982 and 1989, during which time the CIA ships billions of dollars in weapons and other aid to guerrilla forces, annual opium production in Afghanistan increases to about 800 tons from 250 tons. By 1986, the State Department admits that Afghanistan is ‘probably the world’s largest producer of opium for export’ and ‘the poppy source for a majority of the Southwest Asian heroin found in the United States.’ U.S. officials, however, fail to take action to curb production. Their silence not only serves to maintain public support for the Mujahedeen, it also smooths relations with Pakistan, whose leaders, deeply implicated in the heroin trade, help channel CIA support to the Afghan rebels.
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Same-sex couples will stage a mass gay wedding ceremony on Montefiore Hill as part of November’s Feast Festival.
Okay, not all the news — just the stuff I’m ruminating on… er, on which I’m ruminating…
