June 5, 2009

If We Went to Church in Kentucky, We’d Want to Carry Guns, Too… To Protect Us from These Whackjobs

“When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying the cross.”

— Sinclair Lewis
It Can’t Happen Here, 1935

And it will be packing heat.

Kentucky Pastor Invites People
To Bring Guns To Church

A Kentucky pastor is inviting his flock to bring guns to church to celebrate the Fourth of July and the Second Amendment.

New Bethel Church is welcoming “responsible handgun owners” to wear their firearms inside the church June 27, a Saturday. An ad says there will be a handgun raffle, patriotic music and information on gun safety. …

Oh, and gun nuts? Before you get your panties in a twist, I’m one of those rare creatures, a pro-Second Amendment liberal. (Yes, Virginia, we do exist.) I like guns, a lot.

My daddy (a lifetime NRA member, before the NRA went insane) handed me my .410 when I was nine years old, and I’ve been a happy, law-abiding shooter ever since. I just don’t kill animals (it ain’t “sport” until you give the animal a gun and teach it to shoot at you — and anyway, I’d rather blow apart abandoned washing machines in the Oatman dump); I don’t buy the bull-puckey argument that you need fully-automatic weapons to go “deer hunting” (what do you want, to avoid the butcher’s fees by turning the carcass into hamburger on the spot?); I have no reservations whatsoever about the fed doing background checks, ’cause, frankly, fellas, I’m clean (are you?); and I don’t want certifiable nuts (like that potential assassin in Utah) getting their hands on firearms if at all possible.

So cool your red-hot barrels, and don’t jump my ass about being one of these damn anti-gun lib’ruls, ’cause I’m not. So not.

Posted by: Sapphocrat

Permalink | |