May 16, 2009

Think About Whose Children? Certainly Not Our Children.

“I glanced at HC and saw an unusual expression on her usually placid face, one which I will not easily forget, and she asked, ‘Mom I don’t get what is wrong with other kids learning about my type of family?’”

I use “our” to mean “our community’s children,” of course.

And, of course, when they scream, “Think of the children!” they don’t mean our children.

Read it and weep — and that’s not a figure of speech:

What next ? … as we continue to protect our kids..we wait for an outcome…

The fate of California’s same-sex marriage hangs in the balance, as the Justices prepare their ruling on the challenges to the validity of Proposition 8. In my house of married two moms, we remain overtly safe. However if the result is not favorable, then I am faced with having to inform my children that gay and lesbians are no longer allowed to marry under the law of this State.

My children will undoubtedly suffer from the confusion engendered by this fight; first we could not marry, then we could, and now we cannot. Regardless of whether the prior 18,000 California marriages, including my own, are retroactively upheld or invalidated, the mere fact that L and G marriage is effectively ‘outlawed’ establishes for my children a communal disdain towards the marriage of their two moms and our status as “family.” …

Three months of gay marriage and then enter Proposition 8 together with the egregious advertisements facilitated by the millions of hateful dollars sent from Utah’s Mormon community to California, intent on promoting the proposition that would serve to outlaw same-sex marriage and serving to insult my family and our values. About two weeks before the Nov 2008 election and the impending prop 8 vote, HC and I were driving our route to school. Amidst our usual morning tussle between Stephanie Miller and Radio Disney, an advertisement popped on the radio. As I listened to the twisted misrepresentations, “……and your children will be forced to learn about homosexuality and gay relationships; ….. your churches will be forced to marry them… blah..” (I am relying on faded memory here,) I glanced at HC and saw an unusual expression on her usually placid face, one which I will not easily forget, and she asked, “Mom I don’t get what is wrong with other kids learning about my type of family?” I was stunned! The advertisement had placed a perspective calling for this very question by my child and those of us who have lived our lives so openly and most fortunate to have accepting communities, where our ‘same-sex-ness’ is the least of our day to day issues.

The advertisement had clearly hurt my child; its viciousness was not something she had been subjected to before. …

The “Yes” win was a shock and a huge upset; I had a lot more explaining to do; “mom is our marriage okay are we still married? (Our marriage is clearly viewed by my kids as a family event!) The day after the election, HC came home from school and told me that her class teacher had told the group she had voted for John McCain. Living in Marin County California, I do believe the kids found this quite odd. Then she said, “Mom its so weird Mrs. R. also told the class that she voted “yes” on Prop 8; and I think she must have been just joking!” Well long story short, she was not joking – and my child was completely devastated. …

Fortunately, HC is back to being her happy self, but I am sure this has had a deep and profound effect on my child. If prop 8 is upheld by the pending judicial decision, I truly believe that my child will be further harmed, emotionally, by the perceived abnormality of her family. It is so unjust and so unfair. Our children do not deserve to be the political pawns of the divisive and fearful bigots and religious right in our country. We are family values and we are entitled to equality and this Mom will carry on fighting regardless of the outcome. …

More at the link, well worth the full read, along with beautiful photos of a beautiful family.

Posted by: Sapphocrat

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