May 13, 2008

From the Mail Bag

Re: “Certifiable Obamaniacs: Food Tasters for Obama“:

Name: wiznit
emailaddress: wizinit@—.com
Message: If you knew who Art Buchwald was, you would know that Food Tasters for Obama is pure political satire.

You missed the main point of the story, however:

“theObama food tent will be large, with room for everyone. “We are fully inclusive and are sure there will be meaningful roles to play for supporters of all dietary persuasions. That includes kosher and halal, veggie and vegan, gluten- or peanut-free, and any other kind of food allergy. In fact, Steve from Norman OK, one of our most ardent members, is a lactose-inolerant soy latte drinker who stays awake all night thinking about getting started. I told him to switch to decaf until he gets the call.”

For you, I suggest prune juice.

Gee, I guess you made a fool out of little old me, didn’tcha?

Land-o’-goshen, now, let’s see: Why in the world would I give any credence at all to such a silly idea as “Food Tasters for Obama”? ‘Cause I’m just one of those dumb ol’ wimmin-types fooled by another one-a them smart, edumacated Obama folks?

No; it’s because your idea of satire is reality to the most extreme lunatic fringe inhabiting ObamaWorld™.

With his nearly universally humor-impaired supporters losing sleep for months over Obama’s safety, not-so-veiled threats against Hillary (can you say “projection”?), constant regurgitation of right-wing lies about the Clintons (can you say “Vince Foster”?), unparalleled feverish devotion to their Savior (there’s a reason for the “cult” comparisons; see Jonestown), and after endless paranoid lunacy such as this disgusting filth (in response to the question, “Why would Hillary want to be the VP??”)…

Link to the cached thread

…which are only the most recent examples of this sort of thing I’ve seen, you convince me why would anyone put that kind of “thinking” past Camp Obama.

I’d like to tell you to consider it a compliment that your satire went over so well, but in truth, it fell flat because Obama martyrdom doesn’t sound like a joke at all; no one who’s paid attention to the True Believers this long would laugh it off, because the most deranged Obots are really saying this stuff, in all seriousness.

And how do you explain the fact that there really is a “Food Tasters for Obama” group awaiting approval on Obama’s site (still there as I write this)? If it’s a joke, it’s a pretty stupid one, as it makes Camp Obama look completely insane. (Doesn’t anyone over there have the good sense to scrub that page?) But it wouldn’t surprise me one bit to learn that someone who really believes all the KKKlintoons-Are-KKKillers lies was “inspired” by your satiric piece, and is ready to make the ultimate sacrifice for The Anointed One.

In any case, I must admit you have the makings to be a pretty fair satirist — that is, if you can knock off the mean-spiritedness (and learn to use a spellchecker). Take a lesson from your idol, Andy Borowitz: He never ruins his own punch line by insulting the reader. You had a receptive audience in me until the crack about “prune juice” — which, by the way, you can save for the Hillary-is-a-murderer whackjobs, who are the ones full of shit — and who’ll need it to wash down their daily dose of Haldol.

P.S. I read Art Buchwald. I loved Art Buchwald. Art Buchwald never insulted his readers, either.

Posted by: Sapphocrat