April 27, 2003
More Eye Candy? Uh, Not Exactly!
Don’t ask me where this pic came from — I have no idea; one of my li-buh-rul friends forwarded it to me. (And I apologize profusely for the resulting gags and spit-takes this has undoubtedly caused — but I couldn’t resist.)
I’ll make up for it with my favorite Dubya joke:
So, one day in the far, far future, Dubya dies and goes straight to Hell, where Satan is waiting for him.
“I don’t know what to do,” says Satan. “You’re at top of the list, but there’s no room in Hell right now. You definitely have to stay here, so I’ll tell you what I’m going to do: I’ve got some folks here who weren’t quite as bad as you were. I’ll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I’ll even let YOU decide who leaves.”
Dubya thinks this sounds pretty fair, so Satan leads him down a long corridor, and opens the first door. Inside is Ronald Reagan and a swimming pool. Ronnie keeps diving in and surfacing, getting out, diving in and surfacing … over and over and over again, forever.
“No, sir,” says Dubya, “that isn’t for me.”
Satan leads him to the next room. Inside is Richard Nixon with a sledgehammer and an enormous pile of rocks. All he does is swing that hammer, breaking big rocks into little rocks, over and over and over.
“No, I don’t think that’s for me,” says Dubya.
Satan opens the next door. Inside, Dubya sees Bill Clinton tied to a Barcalounger, with Monica Lewinsky on top of him, doing what she always did best.
Dubya blinks and looks again. He rubs his eyes. Then he smiles.
“Right, sir,” he says to Satan. “This, I can can handle, for all eternity.”
Satan smiles, too. “OK, Monica — you’re free to go!”
Filed under: Free Speech, George W. Bush, Humor
